I said goodbye again today. One of my coworkers and good friends has left the Farm for good. The funny thing is that everytime this happens (and it happens a lot) it feels like they’re just going on a vacation and they’ll be back next week, or that I could walk down the road and stop in their house after work to see what’s up. But no, the house is empty and her position has been filled. She’s driving back to St. Louis.
Another team member is leaving tomorrow. One of our guests is going to college out West and he’s leaving behind a great hole in the kitchen. Another goodbye, different, and still so hard. I’m excited for both of them. I wish them well, and I hope to see them again.
We never get good at saying ‘goodbye’ here. Oh, sure, we know how to celebrate the going, but we still ache over the parting. We lose a piece of our community, no matter which side of the fence we’re on. That’s why we can call ourselves a community. Our guests and staff all have unique roles here in addition to the roles we pay, or get paid to play. When one of us goes, we all feel it, and the community loses. And when somebody new arrives, we all pull him in and we gain something fresh.
All the goodbyes occurring and impending keep me in mind of my own departure. That’s going to be hard, and I wonder what kind of hole will be left behind in me when the community and I let each other go.
4 comments:
Oh Friend,
This is not going to be easy, this is going to be hard. It is supposed to hurt, remember friend, without the pain we wouldn't feel human...or realize that some people and good things are never to be replaced.
You will leave a hole in the community, but you can put a patch and some paste on that hole by visiting...at least that is what I think I am doing when I visit. :)
Yikes, what a hard time. Change stinks. But perhaps you should be saying goodbye to the moments and not the people. If you keep track of your scattering friends, you'll have safe harbors wherever you travel in this old world, and through them meet more people, and slowly shift the global friend-to-stranger ratio. "Goodbye" becomes "see you later" because honestly, as I've experienced it, you usually do. Those who insist on sticking to "goodbye" often reach the point where they resist "hello," and that's the real tragedy. Far better is the parting of ways between friends than a friendship never realized.
But saying goodbye to moments, that's very real. Putting the same people together in the same place doing the same thing as before will never recreate the original feeling. Alas, but that's life all over, isn't it?
Oh friend, I hope it is a comfort to know that some friends keep in touch, and some SPECIAL friends come back to stay... :-)
Thanks, guys. I like the idea of saying goodbye to moments, although I do believe that sometimes saying goodbye to people is necessary, even when it's not forever. I know I'll always have all of you somewhere, if not right beside me and that's a comfort.
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